


Nights on Illium

by Ilyasviel



Series: Mass Effect Writing Circle [8]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Cunnilingus, F/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Shameless Smut, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-19
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2019-02-04 11:17:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12769902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ilyasviel/pseuds/Ilyasviel
Summary: After the madness of recovering Subject Zero from Purgatory,  where, as always, everything has gone FUBAR as soon as Jane has put a foot in the prison, Joker decides to book a room on a place Liara has recommended him last time they visited...





	Nights on Illium

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote during the Mass Effect Writing Circle, with maybe more alcohol on my body than planned xD The work is not edited, so sorry for any typos and mistakes ;)

The Normandy docks in Illium after the madness of recovering Subject Zero from Purgatory,  where, as always, everything has gone FUBAR as soon as Jane has put a foot in the prison. Joker has been sitting on the Normandy, hearing everything, with the vitals of the ground team on his screens, worried to death every minute of the mission. After the battle, Shepard has almost run to the cockpit, sealing them inside and sitting in the floor beside him, just letting him pet her hair until she relaxed enough to talk with the rest of the crew and face Jack again. As soon as she storms away from him, he selects the destination, opening the extranet to book a room on a place Liara has recommended him last time they visited. He has ignored every question from Miranda and Garrus about why they are going to Illium again, turning off the speakers diligently. The damned button is getting old thanks to the cancer ship and her diatribes, but who cares? 

 

The ship lands softly in the designated dock, one of the best and closest to the market area, a gift from Liara, and he can’t thank her enough for that. As soon as the control tower gives them the green light, he contacts Shepard. “Hey, Commander. Are you alive?” A soft grunt is his answer, and he chuckles softly, “Glad to hear that our new team member didn’t kill you for sure this time. I have a surprise for you.”

 

That seems to pick her curiosity, because he can hear the sound of her shifting, on the couch maybe? “Is the reason we are docked on Illium without anyone having selected the destination?”

 

“You are no fun, Shep. Do you want my surprise or not? We can return to the ugly and dirty Omega if you prefer.”

 

He can hear her sighing before answering him. “No. The team deserves a rest, and Illium is a nice place to have it. Besides, now that we have a convict with us, we can’t even go to the Citadel until we have her controlled. Let the asari deal with her for a while.”

 

Adjusting the cap on his head, he stands from the chair, straightening his back and popping some bones in the process. “Then is settled. Will you join me in the cockpit in around five minutes?”

 

The sound of her standing from wherever she has been sitting reaches him, making him smile fondly, “Sure thing. I’m on my way. I hope that surprise will be worth enough for the scolding I’m going to have from Miranda tomorrow.”

 

“I truly hope so.” The hiss of the elevator’s doors closing signals her position, and he fixes his cap before blocking the consoles and leaving the cockpit, leaning on the wall beside the exit and talking with her using the omnitool. “Will you protect me from her ire? I’ve been ignoring her for the past hour, and you know how bad she deals with not being the world’s perfect belly button.”

 

Shepard appears on the CIC, giving a short nod to Chambers on her way to the cockpit. “That will depend on how good your surprise will be.” Her strong step filled the silence of the hallway that leads to the bow of the ship. Seeing him leaning against the wall, she smiles at him, closing the comms. Stopping in front of him, she crosses her arms. “Ok. I’m here. Where’s my surprise, Flight Lieutenant?”

 

“Oh, we are in rank mode again, huh? Ok, ok, Commander. My surprise is outside the ship. And I plan to keep you there all night. Maybe it will be good to let the team know that you will be--” He closes the distance to her, a mischievous grin plastered on his face, and keeping an eye to the few crewmembers that are roaming the CIC, “completely inaccessible for the rest of the day and night.”

 

A matching grin grows on her face, and she raises a hand to put it on his chest, enjoying the hard muscles she knows are hidden under the uniform. “That sounds like a challenge.”

 

With a wink, he steps away from the wall, tilting his head and pointing with his hand to the door. “Let’s see how it goes. But Commander, I’m the only one allowed to bring weapons to this mission.”

 

She chuckles, following him while writing the message to Chambers, asking her to inform the rest of the team about the free night. “Feeling cocky, huh?”

 

The Normandy’s door closes behind them, and Joker sets the pace to a slow stroll. “We can call it a weapon, Jane.” Looking at her over his shoulder, he giggles his brows while his mouth turns into a grin, “I know, for sure, that it can make you scream and turn you into a useless ragdoll. It's pretty effective with you.” 

 

Shepard pushes his shoulder, making him laugh, “Definitely cocky. Now I’m curious about that surprise.”

 

“You will see soon enough. We need to grab a skycar. Sorry, but you will need to keep my slow pace for a while.”

 

With a chuckle, she steps beside him, “Didn’t I have to do it every single time, Casanova?”

 

They leave the docking hallway, taking the door that leads to the cargo area. They have just reached the stairs that lead to their destination when Shepard’s omnitool begins to beep. Raising it, she opens the commlink, and a very pissed Miranda appears on the screen. “Lawson.”

 

The biotic’s voice sounds as angry as one can imagine by her look, “Commander. Why in the void are we on Illium? And where are you?”

 

With a roll of her eyes, Shepard’s face turns into a severe frown, fixing her gaze on Miranda’s face on the little screen. “We are here because I want it. You don’t need to agree or even know about my decisions or course of actions, Lawson. Remember who is in charge of the fucking mission and who is your commanding officer.” Closing the comm without leaving Miranda talk, Shepard keeps walking in the taxi’s direction, with a very amused Joker in her tail. “Shush. Don’t break the magic of the moment.”

 

Joker fights very hard to keep the grin away from his face, but he knows he is failing spectacularly when she rolls her eyes at him when they reach the taxi console. They share a little giggle while the taxi arrives, with Shepard trying to look pissed with him, but he reads her like an open book, knowing that she is fighting the laugh as hard as him. The car arrives, and he opens the door for her, making her chuckle and call him ‘Casanova’ again. He enters the car too, turning on the screen to select the destination. He can see Shepard looking intently into the screen, trying to see where they are going. Taking off his cap, he puts it on her head, lowering the visor until it covers her eyes. “No peeking, Jane. I want to surprise you, remember?” 

 

Her huff accompanies the movement of her arms crossing over her chest, “Fine. But really, I expect it to be an awesome surprise.”

 

The skycar takes off, surprising Shepard, who makes a soft ‘woop’ making Joker chuckle. “I hope it will be awesome, but time will say. We will be there soon, don’t worry.” Less than five minutes later, the car is landing on a private terrace on the Sanves hotel. Joker has used a good amount of credits to have this suite for the night. Taking a deep breath, he closes the distance to her, pulling off the cap while giving her cheek a soft peak. “Welcome to paradise, Jane.”

 

Shepard lost the ability to talk while her brain accepts what she is seeing. They have landed on a terrace, covered in green and flowers. A big room can be seen through the windows, and a little pool and a jacuzzi lay to her right. She keeps examining her surroundings but moves a hand to capture one of Joker’s, interlacing their fingers. “Well, consider me surprised, love.”

 

Squeezing her fingers, he raises the hand to his lips, giving her a sweet kiss on each knuckle before letting it go. “Wait until you see the room. Come on, the taxi has to leave, and I want to enjoy our time here to the max.”

 

They exit the taxi, which takes off as soon as the doors close behind them. Shepard is still in awe, looking around, touching the flowers of the flowerpots around her. Joker walks to the doors, using the code from the booking mail to open them. As soon as he steps inside, the sound system and the lights inside and out turned on. Everything is bathed in a pale and soft blue light, giving the room an ethereal look, with the shiny metallic surfaces and the white furniture. Shepard is leaning against the doorframe when he turns in the middle of the room. She wears a lopsided grin, and her arms are crossed over her chest, “I must admit that I  didn’t expect this.”

 

Joker picks the bottle of sparkling wine from the table, together with a pair of glasses, before moving to her. “I can add the ‘I’m the one who can surprise the mighty Commander Shepard,  twice, to my CV.” She sticks her tongue out to him, stepping away from the doorframe when he comes closer. “Now, my dear Commander, I must ask you to hand over your clothes until tomorrow. No garments allowed for the next twelve hours.”

 

“Bossy.”

 

“You love it.” He winks at her, passing beside her on his way to the pool. It is the main reason he booked this very room. The water gives him more freedom of movement, taking away the weight from his legs. Reaching the deck chairs beside it, he puts the wine on the little table between them, putting the cap on one of the chairs and turning to face her. When he finds her still at the door, looking at him with a quizzical frown, he shakes his head, pointing to the pool. “I believe I'm being pretty obvious here, Jane. Use that strategist mind of you to add one plus one and move your freckled ass here, my love.”

 

Her soft chuckle travels directly to his heart, and Gods above, the way she is moving her hips while walking to the pool is going straight to his groin. “Don’t know if I like that bossy side of you, Jeff. But it looks like a good day to try things, huh?” Stopping in front of him, she keeps eye contact with him while her hands begin to work in her clothes. The formal uniform she wears whenever she isn’t inside of her armour gets opened with a deft movement of her fingers. The jacket fall from her shoulders, getting caught on her hands for some seconds before she let it fall to the ground. With a wink, she bends a knee, unlacing her boots, one after the other, before doing the same with his. He is looking every movement with predatory eyes, and when she finishes with the laces, Joker puts a hand on her shoulder before she can stand, “Now that you are down here, mind to help with my trousers too?” She mutters a ‘bossy’ under her nose, but he can hear the amusement in her voice. Her hands travel up his legs, in a slow movement, until her fingers find the waist of his pants. Moving to the centre of it, she opens the button and lowers the zip, slowly enough to make him growl. Once his trousers are opened, he puts a finger under her chin, raising her face to look at him. He keeps pulling her up until she is standing in front of him. Closing the little gap between them, he captures her mouth in a life-sucking kiss, putting all his passion and dirty thoughts into it, making her gasp and lose her mind on it. Joker lets his hands roam over her back, finding the perfect spot to grab her ass cheeks and pulling her against his body, grunting softly when her curves mould perfectly with his hardness. Her hands are working clumsily with the closings of his uniform, making him break the kiss with a half laugh, half grunt. “Clothes off, Jane, right now.”

 

Shepard steps away from him, panting softly, and begins to take off the garments, using the feet to pull off the boots while she peels off the tank top from her upper body. He does the same with his own clothes, letting them half folded on the same chair as his cap. She is in her underwear in record time, and Joker has to smile at her. The eagerness he always brings on her is the better aphrodisiac he never heard about. Pulling down his pants, he steps out of them, letting them fall unceremoniously over the chair before taking her back in his arms. Her skin is so soft… even before she healed the angry scars, her skin has been perfect. A game for him. A map to follow, enjoying the moles and battle marks over her back, following the trail of wounds of her belly, the bones of her ribcage, the firm muscles under his soft skin. His fingers find the closing of her bra, opening it with a little twitch of them, making her giggle. “You magic fingers are working hard today.”

 

Following the line of her spine, Joker slides his hands under her panties, lowering them while he bites her neck, enjoying the little sounds she makes. “I’m gonna show you how hard my fingers can work on that beautiful body of yours.” When her panties are around her ankles, he uses a hand to raise her leg, encouraging her to step away from the discarded garment. She takes the hint, taking one ankle from the fallen panties before throwing them into the pile of clothes near the chairs. Pushing her away from him with a hand on her chest, he grabs the bra and pulls it away from her, letting it fall to the ground. Looking intently into her eyes, he keeps pushing her to the edge of the pool, stopping at the last moment with a chuckle. “I was planning to throw you into the water, but I don’t want to finish my night at the medbay. Wait for me in the water, will you?”.

 

With a giggle of her own, she grabs him, pulling him to her body and letting herself fall into the water, dragging him with her between her laughs and his swearing. They landed with a big splash, water spraying everywhere around the pool. They surface soon, and she runs away from him, giggling like a child. “I’m sorry, Jeff. It was so tempting to not doing it!”

 

Following her, he corners her near the steps of the exit, “I’m not mad. But now I have to think on a way to make you pay for it.” She let him capture her, pinning her against the wall. Her legs instinctively wrapping itself around his waist. The water makes her float, giving him the chance to keep her in that position. He uses the tip of his tongue to follow the hard line of her jaw, finishing on her hear, before tracing the shell of it, making her gasp. Biting softly the lobe, he keeps kissing and biting her neck, until he reaches the pulse point, where he sucks, hard enough to leave a dark bruise, marking her skin. A loud moan escapes her control, fuelling Joker’s passion. Straightening his back, he fixes her gaze on her face, waiting until she recovers a bit of control and looks him back. “Rest your arms on the edge.” She does as told. She can be the Commander everywhere, but right here, right now, she let him take all the decisions for her. Leaning booth arms on the edge, she lays her head back too, resting the upper part of her shoulders and head on it too. He untangle her legs from his back, grabbing her ass while stepping back. He raises her body until it is floating over the surface of the water. His right hand finds a perfect spot on her small back, keeping it floating in the perfect spot, while his left hand opens her legs for him. Her foggy mind can imagine what he wants to do, but she screams his name anyway as soon as his tongue touches her inner labia. Knowing and feeling are two different things, and soon she is thrashing under his care. The hand on her back keep her floating, while the other keeps her inner labia open to let his tongue move in whatever direction he wants. He plays with her with gusto, tongue playing with her clit before moving to enter her, lapping her juices in a greedy way. She is a gasping mess in no time, with trembling legs and broken voice, and he can’t feel more proud of himself. He is tongue-fucking her when the first telltale of her orgasm hits him, and he pulls away from her, making her shudder and swear. Kissing her belly, he lets go her hips, moving closer while she lowers her legs. Stepping to the wall, he rests her body against it, extending a hand and grabbing her arm before pulling her against him. Her body is pliant under his touch, and he knows exactly what she needs. Turning her over her heels, he rest her back on his chest, using both hands to pin her against his body. “Time to show you some magic with my fingers, love.” 

 

Her head falls to his shoulder the same moment his hand grabs one of her breasts, twisting the nipple between his thumb and index. The other hand slides down her abs, finding the heated core of her body. His deft fingers find the hardened nub of nerves immediately, using the tip of his fingertips to trace it, putting the perfect amount of pressure to make her moan. He keeps teasing her until her hand grabs his wrist, nails digging his skin. Sliding his fingers even lower, he finds her entrance, delving inside of her in a swift movement and enjoying, maybe too much, the loud way she screams his name. Feeling his own erection pushing under the wet and ungrateful material of his underwear, he decides to give her what she needs before they can move to what he wants. His fingers keep moving in and out of her, and he adds the pressure of his palm on her clit to the mix, biting her shoulder hard enough to make her gasp every time. Soon enough her inner walls begin to pulse around him, her breath quickened and her moans growing louder by the second. With a knowing smile plastered on his face, he pinches hard her nipple while using his tongue to draw a trail up and down her neck. When her back arches, he bites her pulse point again, hard and adding some sucking, just like she likes it. Shepard is moaning his name, totally oblivious that they are in the open, with other suits in the same level that can hear her screams. But he can’t care less right now. The feeling of her body crumbling under his touch is intoxicating. He keeps his fingers moving inside of her until the pulsing walls begin to relax around him. “Still with me, love?”

 

Shepard pushes herself away from him, turning in his arms until she is facing him, still breathless. “Always.”

 

That word. That overused and straightforward word is better than any promise, any ring. She means it. Joker can see it in her eyes, in the way she tilts her head to one side when she says it. And with her, it means literally always. For whatever time they have in this God’s forsaken galaxy, she will be his. His hands cup her face, lowering her until their lips are almost touching. “You know I love you, right?” Her answer, close the gap between them, sealing their mouths, tongue delving inside finding his and dancing with it for some seconds. Pushing away from the wall, she wraps her legs around his waist as soon as they move, eliciting an approving growl from him while he turns to pin her against the edge again. Still kissing her, Joker uses a hand to lower his underwear, freeing himself from the cage of wet material. Even in the heated water, he can feel the heat emanating from her core, which just adds to his own raging fire. Breaking the kiss, he leans their foreheads together, sharing the broken breathes they are trying to take. Her hand slides down his chest, enjoying the hard muscles of his upper torso as she always does, touching more than necessary, fingers following the curves of his chest, the lines of his ribs. Her hand finds its way to his erection, wrapping her delicate fingers around it, caressing it, wrist moving up and down until she gets the moan she has been looking for. “Don’t be a tease, Jane.”

 

Using her free arm to surround his shoulders, she raises up her body, face hovering in front of his, “Said the pot to the kettle, love. But don’t worry. We have the rest of the night for the teasing. Right now--” She positions his stiff member in her entrance, hand keeping it in place while she lowers her body, engulfing him in a slow motion. “Gods, Jeff--” Her head fall back, a low moan, the kind of sound you can feel as well as hearing, escapes her. “Yes!” 

 

Joker didn’t need any more word from her. Positioning his legs better, he pushes her back to the edge, where she rested her elbows. His strong arm surrounds her waist, keeping her in place, while the other hand grabs the edge of the pool with white knuckling force. He has dreamt of taking her this way for years, and now he is finally doing it. Pushing away from her slowly, the heated water can’t compete with the blazing hot of her core, making him shudder when it touches his cock. With a quick movement of his hips, he enters her again, causing her head fall back in a silent scream. Repeating the motion, he keeps moving until he finds the spot he has been looking for. The shiver that runs up and down her body when he finds it is the signal he has been waiting. Stepping forward, he pins her body entirely against the wall, and she wraps her arms around his neck. His hands move to her hipbones, finding the perfect spot to grab her and move her body up and down in rhythm with his hips. None of them has enough blood in their brains to form coherent words, and the only intelligible word that one can make between their shared moans and gasp are their names. Soon than he wanted, Joker can feel the pressing sensation of his orgasm coming to catch him, and he can’t do a single thing to fight against it. His hips begin to move harder and faster, making her groan at the sensation, while he buries his face in the crock of her neck, inhaling her essence like a perfume. Feeling the end near, he bites the mark he has put in her throat before, making her shudder. Her inner walls tremble with her when he keeps punishing her skin, making his body react to it. “Damn, Jane. You feel too good to be real.” His husky voice, breathless for the effort and the passion of their lovemaking seems to be her breaking point, and she moans her name, louder than ever, nails piercing the skin on his back. His own release is not far away, and after four or five thrusts more, he buries himself as deep as possible, unloading his charge inside of her with a low grunt. They milk one another for several seconds, bodies trembling for the effort. His brain seems to be online before hers, and grabs her body again, taking the few steps that separate them from the stairs. They are still connected, and he hasn’t no intention of breaking the contact yet, so he manoeuvres them with care until he is sitting in one of the steps, water barely reaching their chests. Joker awaits until she comes down from her high, wearing a contented smile on her face, even when she is still trying to catch her breath, just like him. “I love you, Jane Helen Shepard.”

 

She cups his face with both hands, giving his lips a soft peak, before kissing his nose, his forehead, his eyes, making him giggle. “And I love you too, Jeff Moreau. Thanks for the present.”

 

Moving her face lower, nesting a hand on her hair, he positions her face where he wanted it, lips ghosting in front of hers, “You had just taken the wraps of the present, love. The night is young.” She was giggling when he kisses her again, their tongues dancing to the rhythm of their hearts. The night will be a present for both of them, just like that second chance. Shepard can’t be happier for that, and she thanks any God out there for it.


End file.
